real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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