Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
