he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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