I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
