He disabled his match.com account in front of me
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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