halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
