you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
