she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
