is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
