I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
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