His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Randomize
