Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
