"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
