We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
