I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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