Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
