Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
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