I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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