just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize