Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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