I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
