we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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