btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
