This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
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