So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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