sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
