these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
