Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
