I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Randomize
