nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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