Porn is love you can see.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
