she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Randomize
