he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
