Little spoons don't ask big questions
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
