Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
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