We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
where does the pee come out of this thing
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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