Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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