we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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