Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
