ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
My breasts were aching with rage.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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