I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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