Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
