I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
