Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
