It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Randomize
