We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Actions speak louder than pants.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
did you just send me my own nude
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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