am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
bring money and cleavage
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
