ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
