I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
