I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
